E THEME BY EXCOLO
These are the uncensored thoughts of an everything-positive, second generation, fourth wave feminist. This blog is NSFW, unless your work is awesome.




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Anonymous said: I'm not sure if you've answered a question like this before, but could you make a how-to post or direct me to a good one on how to properly remove pubic hair (for a person who never has and is starting fresh)?

Ooh, I’d be happy to do a tutorial on this! I’ll start it tonight, but on the off chance I don’t finish it, give me a day or so and it’ll be up for sure. 

Anonymous said: I've recently connected with an old friend, every time she wants to hang out I can't help but feel insecure and intimidated by her. Have you ever gone through this? If so how do you/ did you handle it?

Oh, absolutely. I’m incredibly intimidated by peers, especially those who I knew once-upon-a-time and have their shit together now and are doing things I feel are impossible for myself. 

I have to constantly remind myself of all the good I have done, of all that I’ve accomplished, of all of the struggles I’ve overcome. I find it really helpful to remind myself that these people want to be around me, too. Once you get older, nobody forces you to socialize - you socialize because you want to, and you choose the people to do it with.

Tagged with: #insecure  #insecurities  #advice  #Anonymous  #asked  #answered  
Anonymous said: So I don't know of you can help me but here goes: I've always considered myself a straight female. However over the past year or so I felt strange and a little on edge around my female best friend. And recently I've realized I may be in love with her. However I don't get crushes or feel this way about any other girl. Just her. Idk what to call it or if you can even help me. I'm just so confused and have no idea what to do... I'll understand if you can't help.

Well, sexuality is very fluid, so these things happen for people all the time. Don’t think it’s unusual or unnatural or wrong. My best suggestion would be to talk to someone you trust about it (someone you know is not homophobic, because that can blow up fast and be potentially unsafe for you) - discuss it with them, see what comes of it. You can try to figure out what your friend thinks about romantic/sexual relationships with women, then see how to proceed from there. There’s very little harder to manage than an unreciprocated crush - you can get over it, but it takes a while and it hurts. 

Anonymous said: I haven't written you off.

Off of what? 

Tagged with: #what the fuck?  #who the fuck?  #Anonymous  

I suck at making friends.

Tagged with: #true life: I'm abrasive  
Anonymous said: I have serious confidence issues around men. I don't know why, but whenever I interact with men I get really quiet, nervous and, idk, more submissive I guess (doesn't even have to be in a romantic situation). And I hate it - that's not how I am or how I want to be. I don't like being out of control and when I am I feel uncomfortable. Around men, I feel like I lack control and power. I know it's bs, but I feel like I was raised to be like this and I'm having trouble conquering it. Any advice?

Honestly? Practice makes perfect. Try to insert yourself into more conversations with men, and attempt to be true to yourself. I have the opposite reaction when I have interactions with men - I become louder, more brazen, more outspoken, and abrasive. I don’t like who I am with strange men, because it’s not an accurate representation of my typically more thoughtful self. 

Tagged with: #advice  #Anonymous  
Anonymous said: Hi, I love your blog btw. I've seen you briefly talk about eating disorders, I currently suffer from anorexia and it's really difficult to feel "normal" especially in social situations. I was wondering if you battle eating disorders ? And how do you cope? I'm sorry if this might be an uncomfortable topic as it was hard for me to even ask this question.

[TRIGGER WARNING: DISCUSSION OF EATING DISORDERS]

I am diagnosed with EDNOS and Body Dysmorphic Disorder, so I’ve been there. I’m currently dealing with relapses of really destructive behaviors (abusing laxatives, intense restricting of intake, purging, overexercising, etc.) while trying to regain control over my weight, but attempting to do it in a healthy way. 

The best way to cope is to seek professional help. I had been struggling with relapses that got really serious, and I realized that I needed to go back to therapy. It had been over a year since my beloved therapist died very suddenly, and I just got back into it with a new therapist in the last month or so. 

This is an uncomfortable topic because eating disorders are uncomfortable. You must have a relationship with food to survive, and it’s very difficult when our brains turn against that need. You’re always welcome to reach out to me if you need someone to listen, but I’m not a professional. 

Check out the blogs ed advice and aiming for complete recovery if you want recovery-centric blogs. 

Anonymous said: My bff's boyfriend of 3 years just broke up with her and she's devastated. How can I help her through this?

Be there to listen, and be sure to let her know she’s not alone. It’s hard when you’re not ready for your relationship to end, but it’s better that both people in a relationship are honest with each other about their needs - even if the need is to end the relationship. 

Tagged with: #relationship  #relationships  #advice  #Anonymous  
blackfashion:

Lydie, UK
Something New, Something Blue :)
Outfit details http://artbecomesyou.com/2014/08/04/ootd-something-borrowed-something-blue/

blackfashion:

Lydie, UK

Something New, Something Blue :)

Outfit details http://artbecomesyou.com/2014/08/04/ootd-something-borrowed-something-blue/